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THE BIBLE OF UNSPEAKABLE TRUTHS Greg's lastest book is availiable now. amazon.com THE ACTIVITY PIT You can show more support for your friend Greg, TV's Andy Levy and Bill at the ActivityPit! Bring your own chaps and a poncho... Group tours meet up in Bryant Park at 4AM. the activity pit FOLLOW TAS ON TWITTER The Arquette's Stream Of Conciousness, Twittering and Microblogging @arquettesisters ANDREW BREITBART PRESENTS: BIG HOLLYWOOD Check it out check it outers big hollywood KOREAN BBQ IN BROOKLYN May burn your lips. Be careful dokebi brooklyn VOTE FOR SOMETHING WORTHWHILE The Best Hamburger in NYC random blog OUR UK 'MATE'S' ANNUAL SUPERBOWL BETTING GUIDE chickendinner ENGLISHERS ARE TRYING TO BET ON THE SUPERBOWL Isn't it great to live in a country where it's this easy to bet on the game the dinner |
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3:51pm on Thursday the 2nd 2010f September
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VEGAS INDIGENT LIKE GIANT PIGEONS!
If someone looks like he could use a meal, be warned: Giving him a sandwich in a Las Vegas park could land you in jail.The Las Vegas City Council passed an ordinance Wednesday that bans providing food or meals to the indigent for free or a nominal fee in parks.The measure is an attempt to stop so-called "mobile soup kitchens" from operating in parks, where residents say they attract the homeless and render the city facilities unusable by families.
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Did you see how I used the word "indigent" in the headline, instead of the more derogatory "homeless?" That makes me appear thoughtful. Of course, by pointing out that I am trying to appear thoughtful by using the word "indigent" instead of "homeless," I pretty much expose my whole strategy of appearing thoughtful. That makes me socially aware. I predict more socially aware types will be using the word "indigent" in the future. And people who call them "homeless" will be seen as callous by those who are socially aware. Perhaps even racist. I secretly think you're a racist just by reading the word "racist." Oops. I guess that's not a secret anymore. In England, people don't use the word "homeless." They call them "tramps," which is a great word, in my humble opinion. I think it makes our unhoused brethren sound more interesting, more exciting, and possibly even entertaining. Remember the funk band, the Trampps? With two P's! They were great! Disco Inferno!!!! I love that song. And I suppose the homeless - i mean indigent - would love it too. After all, they do enjoy setting garbage cans on fire. Which brings up my next question: Do you think the homeless would enjoy house music? Or would they find it insulting? Let's be honest people: who says that feeding tramps in a park is more compassionate than the neighbors who think it would be better to get these sad folks off the streets and into consistent, proper care? I hate people who think they're doing a service by giving tramps a half of sandwich. All tramps want is a bottle of Mad Dog. And you're giving them tuna fish. You're an ass, frankly. And you're only doing it to make yourself feel better - not the tramp. So, if this is truly a story that cries out for real compassion - then my gut tells me that we should applaud the city. If you stop feeding the homeless in parks, you will then drive them into city services where they might get real care. But if you're socially aware and desire the immediate buzz from pseudo-compassion by handing a burger to a tramp - then you should go whole hog and turn all the parks into a Indigent Petting and Feeding Zoo. Why not? Families can come with their bags of food and amble over to open pens and grottos and actually feed the unwashed by hand! Vendors could sell little protein pellets in ice cream cones - perfect nourishment for the unstable crackhead! It would make for a delightful Saturday. And that's all that really matters. Suddenly, I am hungry. Off to the park! | |||
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