American have not = Lazy ass.

I've said this before and I'll say it again - it's a shame Bill Clinton's mother didn't believe in partial birth abortion as much as her son does.

"American have not = Lazy ass."



So true. How about we call those living off the government because they're too lazy to get a job "wanna-be haves" or "imitation haves".



If hotness was a toothbrush I'd have her in my mouth at least twice a day.

To quote El Rushbo, here's your "show prep":



If [attribute] were a murder case, it would take a team of lawyers to get him off.



If [attribute] were a cocker spaniel, I'd call her name until she came.



If [attribute] were a character on "CSI," I'd obtain a sample of his DNA.



If [attribute] were a mosquito, we'd be irritated by his probiscus.

spaceagent : Personally, I refuse to even dignify that lowlife piece of trash by using his proper name. He doesn't deserve it.

What he does deserve is to share a cold cell with a real "Bubba".

If [attribute] were sinus medication, I'd squirt him up my nose.



If [attributes] were airline snacks, I'd munch his little bag of nuts.



If [attribute] were dramamine, I'd take her on an airplane.

Given how light ejaculate is, no guy who masturbates could be accused of being a mass murderer...

If he worked for Planters, I'd snack on his nuts daily.

Wasn't it Will Rogers who said, American is the only country in the world you where you can drive to the poor house?

Dear Greg, A fanwank from Wankette:

Thanks for this. You have taken my morning conservative rage against incompetence and stupidity and channelled it into "funny".

If cute smartness was flouride, I'd add you to my tap water, and drink you after brushing.

Dark: Thanks for that. We must've done something right, as a nation, to deserve Will Rogers.

Cases of intolerable poverty among the elderly, children and people with legitimate disabilities are few and far between in America. Most people who are poor, choose to be.

Greg is so clever...



if witty remarks were a game of Twister,

I'd do him in many enjoyable positions.

Dog - point well taken. There are any number of names I could have used, but I'm trying to play nice :o)

Greg - can you tell us what happend with Debbie Gibson on Friday? Was she sick or did she miss a flight? Just wondering. Hopefully she can be on in the future. Excellent show anyway - as always!

spaceagent : There's no need to play nice when it comes to that dirtbag.

Wankette: He was truely a great American.

Greg, you're totally underestimating. It only takes about ten minutes to recharge, after all.

If humor were traffic laws, I would violate Anne Coulter in my car.

If intelligence were marijuana laws, I'd violate her before dinner.

If beauty was a jump rope I'd jump her over and over....with the help of my niece and nephew.



If jokes were a bag of trail mix, I'd go straight his nuts.

^^^

that should read:

If jokes were a bag of trail mix, I'd go straight for his nuts.

client0.addonchat.com/sc.php?id=239509

Perverts unite!

ahem, "Anne Coulter" should be "Ann Coulter", just sayin'



That rocks that she's going to be on, can't wait!

Welcome to Red Eye, its like Iron Chef Japan except we are all badly dubbed.



So so, if insite were an cheap steak, I would beat them until they were tender.

There is a guy in the Fox & Friends Fan Club on Yahoo that calls clinton (he uses lower case for people he dosen't like) scum bag and his wife scum queen. And he won't let the rest of us use the term on Ted Kennedy and other scumbags.

"The countless paths one traverses in one's life are all equal. Oppressors and oppressed meet at the end, and the only thing that prevails is that life was altogether too short for both."..........Don Juan____Yaqui Indian Sorcerer

This is completely pointless, but as I sat here thinking of introductions, it occured to me how tragic it is Gatorade was invented at the University of Florida instead of at Florida State.



Think of it! All of our favorite athletes could be drinking Seminole Fluid instead!

Is Gatorade, technically, a Seminole fluid?

Is Jim on vacation?

I look forward to the show, especially as AC has a knack for driving many nuts. There's going to be a high probability that KG will get angry, and I will be a giggling, happy girl. It's just not right.

KG is at his best when he's angry.

He's hardcore, the kind of guy I'd like to hang out and drink with.

Why would Godlington be angry at Ann? He probably agrees with everything Ann says. Awwww yea... Finally Ann on the show!!!



BTW, Gut is a fucking great interviewer, I really don't like hearing celebs yap away but Gut does his homework on them, knows his shit and makes the interview funny. Gotta give Gut props for that. Maybe he can teach the others at FNC how to do it.

client0.addonchat.com/sc.php?id=239509

Doc, where are you?

Ann Coulter-the only woman I'd cheat on, and on, and on, and on and............................................................

Brains, looks, legs, feistiness to the extreme! Can it really be true you have her for an hour? Greg, why did you invite anyone else?

"Is Jim on vacation?"



Jim has been busy with other things.

I hope Ann gets the old Marsden chair. Not enough legs shots on Red Eye anymore.

Sinestral: I would love to see Godlington light Coulter up like a roman candle.

Interesting choice around 8:30 p.m. tonight -- Cowboys-Bills, Yankees-Indians or listening over the internet to the Manhattan police scanner to see if the cops are called out to 47th and Sixth if Ann goes full Marsden on Andy during the taping of tonight's show.

Two Americas, Them v Us, Fox is trying to shut me up. Ann Coulter called me names. The other Dims are stealing my ides. But I'll have my wife bring things up instead of me, cuz she's sick. People wiil feel sorry for her. I can't remember another "platform" quite like this. Silky Phony, the man with a plan.

Glad to see some Coulter Fan's showing up around here. :) Greg told Andy a couple of weeks ago that he liked Ann. I don't understand why Andy dislikes her so much?? Maybe tonight will be a big love fest and will be the beginning of a beautiful relationship. They would make such a cute couple. Looking forward to the show that's for sure.

I think Gut will keep Andy on a tight leash.

Sleepy: Not all conservatives or right leaning libertarians like Ms Coulter.

"BTW, Gut is a fucking great interviewer...



Nothing like, "This movie you're in looks like it's really scary. I'm a grown man, and I think if I saw it I would be scared, so I'm sure young boys would be scared if they saw it. So, what I'm saying is, don't you think young boys should have an older man to attend them movie with them?"

Looks like a good line up tonight - ought to be highly entertaining



Ann Coulter - she's so hot, that if I had the chance, I'd take her in Ted Kennedy's beach house - but I wouldn't drive.

"Brains, looks, legs, feistiness to the extreme! Can it really be true you have her for an hour? Greg, why did you invite anyone else?"



Personally, I'd rather have a stupid woman who can't talk. And if she didn't have legs, that would be another plus. After all, she certainly wouldn't be able to run away.

Tape and rubber suits also work ... too well sometimes.

Jaytan : You are the sickest bastard on the face of the earth.

If you were a stuffed animal, I would hug you.

The "I'd violate her in my car" line was great, Jaytan.

Coulter-Like her when she is smart. Hate her when she's shrill.



American have-nots: The empty vessels that will never ever ever be filled. When you base your life on material worth, there will always be someone with more than you.

> Not all conservatives or right leaning libertarians like Ms Coulter.

I like her because she would look hot in a leather suit or a double rubber bag. She's got that look.

The notion of billions of ejaculations leaves me so skeeved that a double rubber suit doesn't seem as depraved as it once did.

The poll Q should have been: "What percentage of people in America do you think have more stuff than you?" then "What percentage of people worldwide do you think have less than you?"



What a country of spoiled whiners we are! We should be more embarrassed of that than our bloated waists.

Apparently, no one here is divorced. An American "have" can be turned into a perpetual "have-not" by a single biased ruling in any given blue state "Family Court." Perhaps that can topic can be Gut-ted some day, eh?

EJ - Billions of ejaculate in a rubber suit is what is skeevy. I hope they plan ahead and cut an appropriate hole.



I bet those suits are a bitch to get off if you are sweaty.

Darkurthe -



Gatoraide - UF Gators.



Seminal Fluid - Fla State. They suck it out one penis at a time.

Shannan: there is a bright side to a bloated waist. All of the blubber was created with relatively cheap food. In 2009, a lot more of our income will be going to taxes, not food, and the great national slim down will begin.

Shannan: the skeeviness of stewing in my juices was trumped by the skeeviness of being pelted by others. Those umbrella hats and windshield wiper glasses don't seem as stupid now. (That rubber fetishist enjoyed that confined sweatiness; it would make me claustrophobic).

[Dave]: Make sure Gut keeps an eye on Joey Pants, too. He has a tendency to lose his head, y'know. Will you let us know if he has a bowling bag with him?

I wish the Gregalogues were less political; abortion is not a funny topic. You are much better with comic light stories, Greg.

who did they poll? The democratic presidential candidates?

Humor is exactly the vehicle to approach topics like abortion. most people will initially laugh then recoil as the realization of what it is that is going in the garbage hits them.

Ejaculating is abortion?



But (seriously) with the breezy attitude about abortions it certainly points out loud to the fact that we are a throw away society. Kerry Howley's comment the other night about male contraceptives and paying up for abortions was pathetic and completely unfunny.

Elec John - I had an umbrella hat at one point. Don't tell anyone. I also had a hardhat with two beer holsters.



Also - I once overheated in a wetsuit. I cannot imagine wearing two latex suits... much less how he got the second one on. Talc? Baby oil? What a terrible way to die. I would rather die with an umbrella hat on.

"abortion is not a funny topic."



I dunno, have you seen those fetus hockey videos on YouTube? Laugh riot.

Chez-Elle: To this point you don't think anything merits a laff.



Shannan: How dare you correct my riff with somehting like facts! But that explains why the last bottle I drank was a little too salty.





Shannan 2: I thought Kerry's abortion joke was funny, but humor is subjective... I tend to see/go for the riff than wrap ideology around it...

Shannan 3: Double rubber suits seems like the height of precaution...

Didn't Gut say Ann will be on for the full hour? Doesn't Red Eye tape around 8:40 ET? So how come Ann is live on H&C right now?

[Dave], I don't get how that works either. Last week she was "live" on Fox & Friends, AND on The Today Show. I b'lieve there's some kind of Fox News Channel space-time continuum at work here.

p.s. Did Michelle Malkin quit doing O'Reilly? He had some blond chick on with Kirsten Powers in that segment, and -- not so much. I wonder if maybe she said "Me or Geraldo!" after that spitting remark he made. If so -- bad choice!

Dark - I may never be able to replentish my electrolytes again and most certainly not do a semi set jelloshot again. Or eat jelly. Oysters may be out for a while. Sigh. I did laugh though. It was worth the sacrifice.



So, should a woman confronted with a double rubbered man be insulted or presume she has encountered a man who appreciates an abundance of caution?

wankette, Probably Ann didn't stay the full hour or Red Eye tapes earlier now? and that blonde chick is Monica Crowley. She used to be with FNC then went to MSNBC to start a show with Ron Reagan, then it got canceled. Also her sister is married to Alan Colmes =X

Someone is married to Alan Colmes, doesn't that count as necrophilia?



Malkin has her bugeoning media empire and is a mom of two, she is not for lack to do.

Shannan: Wait are you semi set and drinking a jello shot or the other way around? Sorry about ruining Gatorade for you ... remember the Gatorade gum? That is even creepier now.



If you run into that guy, hope he is tied up or there is the off chance he can out run you as that should be your first inclination.

Good grief, yes dark, necrophilia is one thought, but I can't shake the wretched possibilty that their would be offspring from such a clueless bag of horsedung.



I bet Hillary will make him Press Secretary, so he can babble on about platitudes and/or nothing, in which he is uniquely qualifed.

We're doomed!

Years ago I actually read an article that said double baggage was good for a couple of reasons;

1 extra protection (seriously)

2 sheepskin under latex was good for latex allergy



Not knowing his situation I can't address it. I never thought that article would be of use. But it comes up in a thread. Who'd a thunk it?

Shannan: perhaps the double-rubbered man is trying to score with the the same rubbers in his wallet since 10th grade. Although a woman shouldn't be insulted, she shouldn't be surprised if the (red) tide stays out.

After all of this ejaculation talk, I might wash my keyboard down with Ortho-Gynol and battery acid.

I married him... lo so many many years ago. It still freaks me though. Maybe he thought he would be... a Quick Draw McGraw. Anyway, glad he got over that.



You know what really skeeves me now Dark??? That gum that goes "squirt" in your mouth? Sadly, its name was Freshen Up.



I will not be drinking Gatorade for a while tho.

Sheepskin condoms are skeevy.





I wonder who came up with THAT idea...





Allah Akhbar! (no offense normal, non sheep screwing, non jihadi muslims)

I should have said the article was either in FHM or Stuff. Sheepsking kinda freaks me out too. A little too sheepy, the right word escapes me at the moment.

What's the point of the interview segments with stars plugging their recent projects? I don't think anyone watching cares most of the time.



Especially tonight, you have 3 really funny guests, Sherod Smith, that British guy, and Alison Rosen, and then you cut for 10 minutes to talk to some weirdo about a movie no one is every going to see.

Annie, we hardly knew ya. Coulter looked pretty fresh for someone who'd been running around all day. No wonder she's thin.

Does anyone know if the voice in the "Wallet Pix" commercial is Suzanne Sena's? I have this uncomtrollable desire to buy the damned thing, and I don't know why.

Shannan, you've got good reason to be skeeved. The damned things are made of sheep *intestine*. That's like ... being from New Zealand.

"abortion is not a funny topic"

For once, I agree with you but I don't think Greg was trying to be funny.

I think Coulter couldn't think of a good retort to Levy's "If Republicans had brains they'd be Libertarians" jab and quickly rushed over to the studio with the bully who'd agree with her every word and a little wimpy liberal she could make fun of.

Plus, she probably wanted a better endorsement of her book than, "I read half of it at a bar and it was pretty good. I even took notes, but I can't understand them because I was drunk. I did draw a wonderful picture of a unicorn, however. Now quickly, to the Head On commercial!"



And for all of you who find abortion so disturbing, consider the fact that I'd have fathered children if it were ...

...illegal. Which is scarier?

Jaytan, you ought to be more afraid of the ones you don't know about.

I loved how Greg took control of the show. That was the only way to keep Ms. Coulter under leash.

I didn't think anybody would notice...

Jim: WB good to "see" you

Do you think she was pissed when she realized that her book only got 23.3 seconds of air?

Why was everyone dressed up? Were they taking her to the bars near Columbia after the show last night? That would have been priceless - a pissed-off Ann Coulter, with 4 tequila double-shooters in her, being lit up by a bunch of drunk hippies.

Jim : It's just not the same around here without you.

As bitter as you are, we still love you.

I loathe Man Coulter - not 'cuz she's conservative, but 'cuz she's an ugly person, inside and out. Whether she is sincere in her venomous expressions or not, she is an indiscriminant purveyor of hate - and for that she should be shunned.



If her skirt was any shorter, her nugs would be flashin'...