Jim Norton...if hilarity were a garden shed, old men would put their tools in him.

SE is so hot that if she were a month, she'd have to go between July & August.



Jim Norton - if he were a spy, I'd like to capture him.....then pump him.

And now to the Gregalogue...its a inkwell of intelligence...



Jim Norton...he's so funny that jokes use him as their punchlines....



S.E. Cupp...she's as cute as smurfs beat the blood out of a my little pony...



Charles Payne...he knows financial news like I know my house boys shoes...I like to use shoe polish people...

Welcome to Red Eye. It's like "Just Shoot Me," if by "shoot" you mean "dominate."

Jim Norton; in Germany, Nazi scientists kidnapped him in order to develop the Killer Joke. Sadly they read it first.



S.E. Cupp; her eyes can drop a man, in sunglasses, blind at 30-yards.



Charles Payne; if cogent thought were an escalator, youngsters would ride him over and over... until Security came.

Bill Schulz; he's the subject of a new documentary, Thrift Store Lifestyles.

Welcome to Red Eye, its like Return of the Jedi, if by Jedi, you mean diaper rash



Jim: if comedic genius were cough drops, I'd suck on him whenever my throat felt raw



S.E. Cupp: She's so hot that the Sun wears Cupp-tan lotion whenever it goes outside



Charles: He knows money matters like I know chutes and ladders--its the one sport no one can beat me at



Bill: the ASPCA donated money t...

Bill: the ASPCA donated money to him... too bad no one wants to adopt him though.

Jim Norton - if comedic genius was a coffee table, I'd put my junk on him and watch TV.

Welcome to Red Eye -- It's like "An Unmarried Woman", if by 'unmarried', you mean 'unidentifiable'.

...and he's a steaming pile who prints classified files, it's our New York Times correspondent; good to see you, Pinch.

Welcome to Red Eye - It\\\'s like You\\\'ve Got Mail; if by mail, you mean herpes.



Bill Schulz - He lives in denial, and a cardboard box.



Charles Payne - If financial genius were a bank, I would deposit everything I had into him.

Jim Norton, if comedic genius were a sneezeguard, I'd reach under him at a salad bar.

Jim Norton, he is so funny that clowns won't eat him out of respect



S.E. Cupp, so hot that a cup of hot cocoa is now called an se cupp of hot cocoa



Charles Payne, if financial acumen were acupuncture, he could prick me at a holistic medical center

Welcome to Red Eye. It's like Boyz N the Hood if by hood you mean hot tub.

Jim: If comedic genius were my birthday, he'd only come once a year.

Pinch: And he's boozing it up while he's bringing us down...

Hey, welcome to Red Eye! It's like the spy who loved me if by spy you mean proctologist.



or...



Hey, welcome to Red Eye! It's like Benny and the Jets if by Jets you mean restraining order.

Excellent Jimmy intro, Duck!

S.E. Cupp: If beauty and intelligence were the UN, scary (hairy) dictators would take refuge inside her.

Welcome to Red Eye, it's like "the Bridges Of Madison County" if by "Bridges" you mean "Gigolos"

Either way, our leader Greg is dandy eye candy to both boyz and women, but I think his Oliver's should make more frequent appearances. He does the look just swell!

I llove Charles Payne!!! hes the best!!! I am wondering tho.. are Charles and Patrice Oneal: comedians.jokes.com/patrice-o-neal/videos/patrice-o-neal---killing-food



just askin... lol