Following this presidential campaign is like watching a friend of yours dump a psychotic, potentially homicidal girlfriend. In this case – Obama is the friend, and the crazy soon-to-be ex is the left. In the beginning, Obama could indulge the crazies over at the Huffington Post and Move On.org, simply because, back then, the rest of America didn`t know who he was. He could be every bit as loopy as they are – because the saner folk were too busy working real jobs.

But now that he has the nomination, he can drop the Wesley Clark`s of the world like a chlamydia-infested potato. Suddenly among the normal, Obama can no longer hold onto those nutty beliefs - which means, he must turn right. I predicted this months ago – the Democrats know you can`t run left because you`ll lose – which is funny, when you think about it. The only way your party can win, is to abandon your party`s beliefs.

See for yourself: Obama has flipped on the death penalty and thinks guns are peachy. He's accepted the foreign surveillance act and he's no longer entertaining high tea with Ahmadinejad. Now he`s up for expanding President Bush's faith-based programs, and blasted Moveon.org for calling General Petraeus a traitor.

His crazy ex-girlfriend must be cutting up his underwear.

But it`s not over yet. You wait until Obama returns from Iraq– speaking of the brave troops, how violence has decreased and that the surge is working – and how, in effect, we are winning the war. At this point he will embrace the phrase his lefty brethren mocked so well, which is "stay the course," and ultimately acknowledge that the whole thing might have been worth it after all. Once he abandons his idiotic stance on capital gains, the makeover will be complete.

So sit back and enjoy it, as the unbalanced ex-girlfriend roils in her basement apartment, blogging about her heartbreak to her loathsome friends, as the rest of us realize that Obama isn`t running against McCain, he`s turning into him.

And if you disagree with me, then you`re worse than Eric Alterman.